WE'RE EXCITED TO FEATURE ASHLEY CANTU AS OUR FEATURED NIGHT OWL FOR MAY 2024

We dedicate this interview in loving memory of Kolin Maki. 

Meet Ashley Cantu, a multi-talented professional, proficient in various roles such as brand ambassador, a freelance model, content creator/influencer marketer, creative director, event producer, talent coordinator, host, bartender, and performer, deeply embedded in Austin's nightlife. She brings a multifaceted approach to any role she undertake. Amidst a troubling outbreak of fentanyl-related fatalities in the city, the urgency of her message cannot be overstated. Ash shares her unique perspective in a candid interview, discussing her health conscious journey within an industry where substance use is often normalized. Her reflections offer a powerful, resonant message to her community. We are profoundly grateful to Ash for her openness and her commitment to raising awareness about the resources available to those in need. Thank you, Ash, for your impactful contribution.

Tell me a little bit about your background working in the nightlife industry. 

I am born and raised from a small border town called Laredo, Texas. I didn’t start working in the nightlife until I moved to Austin. I started bartending and performing at night as a side gig and ended up liking the fast money for bartending and the exercise through dancing. Music is therapy to me, why I chose to dance, and also I see it as a form of cardio… but there was one thing I noticed a lot through working night shifts on weekends. A lot of people were kind of lost and not connecting with each other. I would see many people escaping reality using alcohol and drugs. I didn’t like being around that. So, I would show up for work, and do what I got to do, and leave. I wouldn’t really stay for afters because, just like my mom said “There’s nothing good after 2am”. It is true. There’s people doing more drugs than ever before, then you lose sleep. In the long run, and as time goes by, this will age you and I’m very aware of that, so I take it seriously. I only believe in plant medicine, anything that is derived from the ground, natural, and would heal you…

I remember just being in a room… the only sober one. It was hard to see. I was the only one able to see everyone’s behaviors and patterns. Everyone is vibing on the same level, and I was very calm observing. I organically have high energy. I don’t need alcohol to have a good time. A lot of friends drink to socialize. I used to be shy. I used to drink to follow the crowd, but I saw how harmful it was to me. I don’t like hangovers, I don’t like the way it makes me feel, and I know it is poison to me. I’ve been trying to stay sober for the past months.. I would rather work and make money than go out and fall into temptation. 

While everyone is out poisoning themselves I’m making some money, and that’s the way I saw it.

The thing that sucks is that people make fun of you or they think you’re weird for not drinking or doing the same things as them…like wanting to take care of my body and saying no to poison is bad why l would rather work and stay healthy. 

Boundaries show up in all areas of life. How do they show up in your area of life working in the nightlife industry?

I used to be a “yes girl”. I said yes to everything, because I put people before me. I felt bad for saying “no” because I wasn’t making them happy, but in the end, I wasn’t making myself happy. That’s what matters the most. If it is not a “hell, yes”, it should be a “hell, no”, and if they don’t respect that then they don’t respect your boundaries and shouldn’t be around. I had to say “no” to a lot of things, especially a big position for work. They were trying to blind me with numbers. They ask how much do you want? That didn’t matter to me. Money blinds people. I had to say “no” because I had seen a lot that I shouldn’t. I didn’t want to part of that. Just saying “no” when it doesn’t feel right or aligned. I learned that “no” is saying “yes” to yourself. 

You mentioned people making fun of you. What other obstacles have you experienced?

The nightlife can ruin a whole routine or schedule…working late and sleeping late. You are still sleeping, but a different schedule than everyone else’s. I felt like I was a vampire. Now, I mostly accept events that are during the day or private events. I am 30. I am not getting any younger. I need to take care of my sleep and my health. I focus my work around health now. 

What about social stigma? Are you treated differently for working in that field?

When it comes to performing, like dancing, that’s one thing that has been hard for me because people judge. A lot of people judge because I am dressed “too sexy”, but I feel free and dancing has helped me heal. Embodiment is a good exercise to cope with stress. That is one thing, I see it as cardio. Exercise is good for you. I go by the very famous podcaster Gary V saying “Don’t fucking care about what anybody thinks.” It’s what you think, and what makes YOU happy. People will talk no matter what but also realize that judgment has more to do with them than you. I’m a firm believer if it’s not hurting anybody and it’s making YOU happy- do it. I remember the first time dancing, I used to have stage fright. I used to be very shy and dancing/modeling helped me to become free and open. I used to hide in speech class and hide behind my paper. I put myself in uncomfortable situations, and that is how you grow…like they say success is on the other side of fear. You have to just jump when it feels scary. I pushed myself and it helped me grow. It helped in so many ways. 

In every industry, there is unspoken etiquette, a way of how you would like to be treated. What would you like our readers to know as far as how to treat bartenders or dancers? 

When it comes to bartending, you’ll have to deal with some drunk people. I have gotten where people will say certain things because they are drunk. We have to deal with hearing things that we don’t want to hear because of that, but we usually work behind a bar with security, manager etc. So, if they could be kind and control their alcohol that would be a suggestion. 

For performing, we are supposed to dance in a certain spot. When we take breaks, people come and dance on the platform. That is one things they shouldn’t do…that and leaving drinks on the stage because we have to come back and dance at a certain time then we see all the drinks on the stage… that messes up our schedule, to clean up.

Also, the the venue is responsible for anyone getting hurt. If someone falls, it is the responsibility of the venue. The bar can be sued if they have no insurance. Also, people come to us and try to talk while we are dancing. We can talk during working hours, we can’t do much during breaks either. During breaks, that is our down time. I want to talk, but I am usually tired and want to rest. I just want them to respect that I am taking a break. We can always talk after I get off of work. 

What is a valuable lesson you have learned working in the night life industry?

I know that everyone is going through something. Don’t fall for peer pressure. Your voice and mind is stronger thank you think and matters more than anyone else’s. If they don’t respect that you’re not drinking, then they should not be your friend. I have friends that I surround myself with that don’t judge me if I don’t. Those are the types of friends you want. Those are the ones I consider friends. 

How has self-care shown up in your life?

Fitness has always been apart of my life. It all started with my mom. It started with watching the workout VHS videos she had in her room. I would be bored and I would put them on to see what it was all about. Then, I joined sports and the gym because of her, too. She was very active and healthy. My mom has a big inspiration on my fitness life. Not about looking good, but feeling good. I have more energy and confidence. Every time I was stressed and sad, I would feel better after a workout session or self care routine. I started doing ice baths. I knew there were benefits behind it. I started doing it, and I started seeing a difference. Last year, when I started taking ice baths, I noticed I had more energy and got sick less. All the soreness that I had would be gone. I sweated all the bad toxins in the sauna. I would feel better afterwards. Self care is necessary. If I don’t do it, I feel like I will get burnt out. You need your “you time”. Put yourself first. It’s happened to me where I had to cancel things because I needed “me time”. If I don’t prioritize self care, then I do not operate at 100%. I always want to operate at 100% and show up as my best self. People will notice, even if I put up a mask on, they’ll see that you’re not too friendly or talkative and misjudge. Your mental health is more important than that job, that relationship, that dinner. You are first. So it is the first thing I do in the morning, I workout. It has help me start off my days right. Self care got me having a work life balance. 

What would you say to someone to who is reluctant to receive therapy?

I think they should try it. You never know until you try. You will be suprised what you will get out of it but not only any type of therapy. You need to find the right therapist for you. There is someone that said “I feel like I need therapy” in a very broken, with a knot on his throat, like therapy is bad.  He said he was so disappointed in himself, like he failed at life. It is not bad, we all need a helping hand, and are humans. There’s nothing wrong with it. I think the most important thing is finding the right therapist. When it comes to therapy, most of them are girls, but sometimes a man needs another man. Sometimes men just need another man to tell them “fucking do it and get out of your head”. They need a push from another man. If a girl does not work maybe find a guy, just find someone who pushes you and inspires you to become the best version of yourself. 

Is there anything else you’d like to say before we wrap up?

Yes, actually. There is something that is very concerning in Austin, and I feel like I need to say it. This needs to be said to save lives. I’ve had friends that passed away through substances. So, Austin is rated the #1 city in the state for the highest capital of fentanyl. There’s an outbreak of deaths last weekend. I just want to encourage this is why people need therapy or rehab. You don’t need drugs to escape reality. Drugs are just a temporary solution. In the end, it is killing you. Find a healthy solution.. You only have one life, don’t destroy it. We need you here. We all need you. I’ve been there before and felt like no one understands me. Believe me drugs are not the solution. You’re going to hurt a lot of people. When overdoses happen… you don’t see that you are hurting so many people around you. I am speaking for my friend who passed away a year ago. I just don’t want to see more friends passing away. It affects everyone around you. Just don’t be selfish and take care of yourself. 

There were signs that something was wrong with my friend. Someone told me “Please talk to him. No one will listen”. I knew that I needed to talk to him. I only saw him out in party settings though. I never thought I was never going to talk to him again. It broke my heart thinking that I could have talked to him and put some sense into him. I told myself that if I see someone else that has those signs, I’m going to tell them. I am going to say something and speak up. Which I have, I saw someone a few months later going in the same footsteps…and that person knows the person that passed away. I told him “I don’t want you to be next”. I put some sense into his head. Sometimes speaking up and using your voice can help someone. Don’t be afraid to use it and just check in with your friends.