WE'RE EXCITED TO FEATURE GERALD LAMINA AS OUR FEATURED NIGHT OWL FOR MAY 2024

Meet Gerald Lamina. He shares his perspective on the challenges of pursuing a career in the landscape of music and nightlife, offering a candid look at the often-overlooked emotional and psychological aspects of being a DJ. His shared experience is invaluable as we relaunch our organization to spread the word about available resources to those in the nightlife industry. We appreciate you, Gerald.

Tell us about your background in the nightlife industry.

I moved to Austin from Chicago to start a career in music. I started throwing my own events because I didn’t really love the nightlife scene here. So, I started creating my own parties to get experience DJ’ing. Last year was my first year that I was really gigging a lot: I said yes to almost everything that was thrown my way.

I still had my 9 to 5, and it [DJ’ing] just started really cutting into my social life. People think being DJ’ing is a super social thing, but it’s really not. At the end of the set, everyone is gone. You’re up there by yourself, packing up your gear alone, and it can be depressing. I feel like I didn’t have boundaries when to say “no.”

This year it’s like a whole reframe for me because of that. I found my boundary. I found how many sets I’m comfortable with per week, or per month.

I love that you mention boundaries. They show up in all areas of life, so how is boundary-setting as a DJ? What does it look like with bars, patrons, club-owners, and friends who want to come with shows? What does that look like for you?

My DJ’ing boundaries are mostly associated with club owners & promoters. Sometimes they try to box you into this niche of only playing a certain genre/style. Or, they really try to undercut your rate. Being able to say “no” to both those situations is empowering and proved to be significantly beneficial for my mental health.

Trying to get gigs in Austin sometimes felt like a rat race: 30 DJ’s all trying to play at the same four spots. Occasionally, fighting to get those gigs and not getting them gave me anxiety. It made me feel like “Damn, am I not good enough?” Which is a super normal feeling when you start doing anything in the entertainment industry. I think when I accepted that I couldn’t be everywhere at once, the anxiety and stress went away and I also found myself playing gigs that really fit me and my style.

Is there anything you would want your audience to know as far as DJ etiquette...

So, yeah I understand now because I run a company... like if my buddy owned a restaurant, I would never come in with 10 people and be like “Give me a free fucking dinner.” If anything, I would pay and tip in full to support my friend. I’m not making a lot of money from this shit because all the money I make goes back in. I just did my taxes. I made no money DJ’ing in 2023. I broke even and I probably put 1000+ hours into it last year. Imagine doing 1000 hours of work and making 0 dollars. That’s like working a 40 hour week for 6 months straight with no vacation and not making anything, just to put it in perspective. When my friends throw events, I never ask if I can be on the guest list. If someone offers it, that’s one thing. Sometimes they do offer it and I still buy the ticket, because I know how it feels to be on the other end of it.  Even when other people in the industry come to my events, they expect to be on the guest list. With some, it’s definitely warranted. They have mentored me or significantly helped me get to where I am right now with DJing and event planning. But for others, like the rogue bartender at some dive I frequent once a month... it’s like “don’t you want to support the cause?” I’ll pay to go to your events. Some people just don’t get it. Maybe it’s a money thing? I find it hard to believe for people who live here in Austin, but here we are. Ultimately I think the sense of entitlement is nuts. People think when they kind of know you, they can just go for free. It’s like, dude, support the cause, support local business, support local artists.

Your candidness is very refreshing because a lot of people don’t speak on that, and that’s something that everyone across every medium of art is experiencing... What are roadblocks you encountered, and when did you know it was time to seek therapy and find some balance? What led you to believe it’s time to seek therapy?

I definitely had anxiety more when I did [seek therapy]. I also wasn’t in the most suitable relationship. That definitely added a decent amount [of stress]. Between that and the event planning, I just felt very strung out and pulled in five different directions. Was I even doing this because I like it? Is this really speaking to me? Am I serving myself or am I just doing this for other people? Sometimes when you’re DJ’ing you feel like a fucking monkey clapping symbols. It’s like, “Well, I’m playing at this popular club, so I have to play more commercial music. Na, fuck that.” That’s where my boundary came into fruition. I’m going to play sets that I want, so that I can play music that speaks to me and my people. There’s a balance.

When I pulled myself out of Austin, and out of the DJ scene, I had a clearer outlook on what I needed for my mental health. I went home to New York for the holidays for like 3 weeks, then I spent a month in Colombia.

I didn’t talk to anyone my first 2 weeks there. Then I started ingratiating with the music scene in Medellin and it was unbelievable. I think it brought me back to my roots about why I started DJing: I love connecting with people and curating a lively environment for people to be themselves. I find that the best way to do that is through music.

How else have you found balance?

I workout. I play soccer. I joined a yoga studio. I’m not super anal about it. I think doing anything every day is unhealthy to some degree. Even if it’s something conventionally “positive” or “healthy.” I workout 4-5 days a week.I journal once a week as well. I did go to therapy...but honestly after making a few really big life changes, I feel so much better...I think I got what I needed from therapy these past 3 months and I’m going to ride without it for a bit. There was a time when I was pretty nomadic: since I graduated college, I’ve lived in 6 different cities... I wasn’t doing that anymore because of DJ’ing. I was tethered to Austin. That was making me feel suffocated. This is the smallest city I’ve ever lived in. I feel like it’s very hard to get your own space and privacy here. It’s kind of ironic because people think New York is such a chaotic thing, and this is quiet. It’s like, dude, I can’t go to the grocery store on a Monday without seeing someone I know. I want privacy. I want to go on a date, and not have ten people see me. It’s uncomfortable. On the contrary, in New York, no one gives a shit. No one is up your ass. I’m not used to the intimate atmosphere here. Hence, I revisited my own finding that I needed to travel more. I’m going to Europe and Africa for the entire month of May. I’m going to continue to go to South America for all of January. I’m not going to be here in the summer either really. And not being here gave me space to miss the city and appreciate it for the same reasons that originally attracted me to it. But for me and my personality, I like moving around, I like absorbing pieces from different cultures. Austin is super white. It’s the least diverse city I’ve ever lived in. It’s super limiting being here 24/7 especially in the realm of music/art/literature.

What would you say is a valuable lesson that you’ve learned in your industry?

You’ve got to take time for yourself to reflect... You’ve got to keep checks on yourself. At least once a week. Pick a day. Have a ritual where you think when did I feel down this week? If I did, what was making me feel down? What were some of my triggers? What was making me feel anxious or stressed? Identifying those things. On the flip side, what makes me really happy? What fucking lights me up? For me, it’s traveling. Traveling alone. That makes me so fucking happy. Maybe being a little more social during the week and not so caught up in all my music and shit. Balancing that, too. Instead of doing music five days a week, do it three days a week. Go hang out with your friends or do something that you really enjoy...figuring out what really lights you up outside of just the DJ’ing or whatever it may be. Some people are really obsessed. Some people are at it every fucking day. That drove me crazy. I was hanging out with people who DJ all the time, and that’s all they talk about it. It’s like “holy shit,” this is driving me up a fucking wall. Just because I DJ doesn’t mean that’s my life. I’m a human being. I’m multidimensional. I have other things that I love to do. I feel like staying true to that helped me. I joined a run club. I’m in a yoga studio. I do things outside of that that make me really happy.

You mention being “more than a DJ”. Everyone experiences social stigma or prejudice in some form. Have you experienced that by telling people you’re a DJ?

For sure. Yeah. Nowadays, I feel like so many people DJ. Because of the sheer number of DJ’s, there are a lot of shit ones [DJ’s]. It kind of pisses me off when people don’t work on the craft, and they slither their way into these gigs. It makes you look bad and compromises the integrity of the work you put in. It makes people not take you seriously. In some ways it was good because it’s like, “Okay, how do I separate myself from the stigma? I need to produce my own music.” So, it’s lighting a fire under my ass to keep progressing my career... so it’s good and bad, I guess. The industry is riddled with some of the shittiest people I’ve ever met in my life. Superficial girls only talking to you because you’re a DJ. Guys that are super power hungry and money hungry. Being surrounded by that on the weekends...spending my time...I didn’t lose myself, but it made me stressed. I need to surround myself with quality ass people. I wasn’t nourishing the relationships that mattered most to me.

Do you feel like you ever encountered the opposite? People who avoid you because you’re a DJ?

Do I feel like people avoid me? No, but I’m a really nice guy though. I’m really friendly. I’m educated, too. I feel like when people give me ten minutes to chat with them, they’re like “Okay, you’re with it. You’re self aware. You’re socially aware. You’ve got an EQ. You’re a normal person.” So, I’ve never experienced that personally.

What would you say to somebody who’s hesitant to seek therapy?

Fucking go and do it, dude. You are doing yourself a disservice if you’re not. You got to try it. It’s so good for you. Especially if you don’t have as much direction or a great network of people who are self aware. I’m really lucky because a lot of my friends are socially and emotionally intelligent, so I’m able to get good feedback and advice from them... I’ve been to therapy on three separate occasions in my life. Usually for acute reasons, nothing chronic.

Generally, everyone should try it. I really appreciate some of the tools it’s given me to deal with certain triggers and traumas.